Wintersong by S. Jae-Jones

Thanks to Netgalley for an advanced copy for an honest review.

This book is one of those stories that changes you after you read it.

The book starts out with a young girl names Liesl who is friends with the Goblin King and as she grows up she forgets about him and her promise to marry him one day. Flash forward to 19 years later and Liesl is a dutiful daughter who has put her dreams aside for her family. She composes music only for her talented younger brother to play, and she dedicates her life to watching over her sister who is devastatingly beautiful and all the things she is not. Now yes there are obviously echos of the plot from Jim Henson's Labyrinth, which only makes me love it all the more.

Like the movie Labyrinth Liesl's sister gets taken by the goblins and she must journey to the Underground to save her, but unlike Sarah, Liesl did not wish her sister away. Käthe instead tastes the forbidden goblin fruit (in a beautiful reference to the poem The Goblin Market) and is trapped in the Underground.

Liesl does save her sister but instead she must remain with the Goblin King as his wife in order to save the world above from eternal winter. The longer she stays with the Goblin King she has come to love, the more of her spirit and life is taken from her. Liesl finds herself slowly wasting away and she must decide what is more important, love or her life.

Over all this novel was fascinating and I would definitely recommend it to all my fellow fantasy lovers. As I said after I finished this book I felt as if it had changed something within me. Similar to when I read Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell. I related to the character Liesl so well (as I did with Cath from Fangirl) that it opened old emotional wounds. But that is the great thing about books, you learn and grow from the characters that are so close to you that their stories hurt. I loved this book and desperately hope for a sequel.

Shades of Milk and Honey by Mary Robinette Kowal

This book had a very interesting system of magic, but that's about all I found interesting. Sure the book is an easy read. The description says it's a cross between Pride and Prejudice and Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell and that is very accurate. However I felt as if I was simply reading Pride and Prejudice fanfiction; which is not to say that it was bad. No I enjoyed the plot and the characters, but overall it felt stiff. Like the author was trying to hard to color inside the lines. I'm curious about how the sequels are since the book ends with the characters being old and gray.

Shades of Milk and Honey is the story of Jane and her sister Melody. Jane is well, a Plain Jane and Melody is lovelier than all the world's beauties apparently. So Jane is the elder sister and is clearly supposed to be Elizabeth Bennett and Melody is supposed to be Mary mixed with Lydia. Basically the two sisters are jealous of each other while trying to navigate the social niceties of the regency period. They both are introduced to a revolving door of handsome suitors, some who turn out well, and others who reveal themselves to be rouges.

Despite my snarkniess I really did enjoy this book. I just have been so set in finding fantasy read a likes to Howl's Moving Castle that this one just struck me as only "okay". I think the problem is that the story was too grounded in reality where as I seem to like the more fantastical and whimsy of magic. As I said earlier I am curious about the sequels, and maybe someday I will read them but as for now I'm closing the book on this story and moving on to the next.

Illusions of Fate by Kiersten White

“There you are, darling. So sorry I'm late.”

I'm having a flashback to Hayao Miyazaki's Howl's Moving Castle film. Which is good, that has been my prerequisite for books lately. Kiersten White wow's us with a fantastic YA Fantasy book about a stubborn girl named Jessa. Jessa is from the island country of Melei (in my mind I think it's like Hawaii or the Caribbean Islands) but she is half-Albion. Thanks to that she has received the opportunity to study in Albion at a prestigious school her father teaches at. Though he is a huge jerk and refuses to acknowledge his illegitimate child.

On her way home from school she meets Finn, and enigma within an enigma. He is a mysterious lord who rescued her from the unwanted advances of another gentleman, things get more confusing with each meeting she has with Finn. Sometimes he's flirty and funny, other times he seems to ignore her very presence or wants nothing to do with her. One night she receives a mysterious package from him, in it is a beautiful dress and an invite to a ball, an because of this she is drawn into a world she does not fully understand. One of long standing grudges and magic. Can Jessa save everybody and find romance in the process?

I love, love, love this book. I'm literary going to be rushing to the bookstore next payday to buy a paperback of this book because I adore it so much. It has romance, wit, well rounded and relatable characters. Thinly veiled allusions to British and American colonialism and the effects it has on the natives (i.e. not good). This book deals slightly with prejudice and racism, but those issues take more of a back seat to the main plot point. I would have like to maybe have this dealt with a little more in depth, but alas I cannot always have what I want. The book is a nicely paced fantasy adventure with a heroine who actually is worth caring about. They only thing I did not like was how rushed the ending felt. This book could have easily ended in a cliffhanger and spurred a sequel, but instead the resolutions were all crammed into the last few chapters. Despite this I would still like to see a sequel. I feel like there is a lot more that can be told about this world, and it doesn't necessarily have to be about Jessa and Finn (à la Castle In The Air).

Overall this was a solid read and I would recommend it to anyone who likes Howl's Moving Castle or The Paper Magician series.

The Master Magician by Charlie N. Holmberg

Ceony is fast on her way to completing her apprenticeship as a Folder to her mentor/boyfriend Emery Thane. Due to their student/teacher relationship they have decided to keep there romance a secret until Ceony graduates, not that people don't suspect they are a bit too close because they do. To combat the gossip that Ceony had an unfair advantage in passing her exams to complete her apprenticeship, Emery sends her to study with another Folder temporarily. Only this Folder hates Emery and dislikes Ceony even more. Ceony finds herself losing focus on studying for her final exam when Excisioner Saraj Prendi escapes from prison to once again go after Ceony and the secrets she learned last year from former Gaffer turned Excisioner Grath Cobalt. Ceony can bond and unbond to materials at will, a magical art long forgotten.

Ceony is ordered by the Cabinet and Criminal Affairs to stay out of the investigation to find Saraj, but Ceony cannot help it. She goes after him, again and again. Each time finding that Saraj is making his way closer and closer to London, and not out of the country as Criminal Affairs believes. On top of this Ceony must navigate her way with Magician Bailey, her temporary mentor, and with the sudden silence from Emery Thane. Has he lost interest in her?

All in all this book was amazing! Seriously this series is one of the best things to happen to me ever. My only complaint is that it was too short! I wanted more happy endings at the end. I was happy Emery and Ceony are engaged at the end, kind of. A little epilogue with them happily married is all I'm asking for seriously! Well I suppose I shall just have to scour the internet for fanfiction to satisfy my curiosity.

The Glass Magician by Charlie N. Holmberg

The adventure continues in The Glass Magician! Ceony Twill is an apprentice Folder to Magician Emery Thane who is struggling to keep her feelings for her mentor hidden. Ever since she trekked through Emery Thane's heart and rescued him from his ex-wife and Excisioner Lira, Ceony has found herself falling in love with her teacher. But she hasn't broached the subject with Emery even after reading his fortune with a Fortuity Box confirmed that she and Emery were destined to be together.

Soon Ceony finds herself in the middle of a cat and mouse game with the other Excisioners from Lira's group. Wanting to know what she did to defeat Lira three months ago, and how to reverse it. Ceony must find a way to stop the Excisioners and continue her studies in Folding, but it's hard to do when her mind is so focused on her feelings for Emery, and examining the possible feelings he might hold for her.

This book was amazing! I could have finished it in one sitting if I didn't have this pesky thing called life interrupting me. The slow burn romance between Ceony and Emery was perfect. It wasn't rushed and it didn't feel like it came out of no where like in some books. There was beautiful romantic tension à la Numair and Daine from Tamora Pierce's Immortals Quartet. I look forward to reading the next in the series.

Paper Magician by Charlie N. Holmberg

Continuing on my quest to find books similar to Diana Wynne Jones' Howl's Moving Castle I found The Paper Magician Trilogy by Charlie N. Holmberg and I have to say I was delighted by this book.

It starts off a bit slow introducing us to Ceony and Emery Thane, as well as focusing on world building. Then the book really takes off with a twist I seriously did not see coming!

The Paper Magician is the story of Ceony Twill who after completing her classes at Tagis Praff School for the Magically Inclined she is assigned to be a Folder (a magician who works in paper) rather than being a Smelter (a magician who works in metal) like she wanted. There are less students signing up to be Folders, so some students like Ceony are assigned to the study. Ceony is distressed by these turn of events and wows the audience with some very lovely snark. Which her new teacher Magician Emery Thane all takes in stride.

Eventually Ceony resolves herself to being a Folder and even finds that she doesn't mind it so much as she once did. She gets into a routine with Thane and advances quite quickly in her studies. When everything is looking up for Ceony finally, the calm bubble that she has created bursts with a visit from Emery Thane's ex-wife and magician on the run, Lira. Lira is an Excisioner (a magician who works in the dark arts, flesh magic). She takes Emery Thane's heart and Ceony manages to keep him from dying by quickly folding a paper heart to keep him alive. Ceony goes further when it looks like no one can save Emery Thane, and goes after Lira to recover her teacher's heart.

Through a series of magic booby traps Ceony finds herself traversing through Emery's heart and seeing who exactly Emery Thane is and was. She has to navigate the four chambers of his heart, see his greatest triumphs, fears, and regrets; all while fleeing from Lira who has followed her. But the deeper into his heart Ceony gets, the more questions arise. With the clock ticking will Ceony save her mentor before it's too late?

This book was fantastic. It has a very slow buildup to the action but once you get there the novel's pace quickens quite a bit. My only complaint is that the book, and the sequels, are all very short. I just know I am going to want more!

Brightly Woven by Alexandra Bracken

This book was a wild ride from start to finish. Recently I have been looking for books that are similar to Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones and through my sleuthing I came across this title.

It is the story of a girl names Sydelle who is from a small desert town that is in the middle of a ten year drought. She is a talented weaver and longs to travel. We find out early on that there have been some political upheavals since the death of the king, but to Sydelle it is all a far away thought when your very survival hangs in the balance from the drought. Then suddenly these problems are brought to her doorstep with the wizard Wayland North. He has sensitive information about the king's death that could prevent a war, but he is being chased by an evil wizard and an army. To slow down those who are pursuing him he brings forth a rainstorm, breaking the ten year drought. Thankful for his help Sydelle's parents, the leaders of the village, offer a reward for Wayland telling him to take anything he wants. What he wants is Sydelle. Sydelle is angry at North because he has forced her to leave her home against her will and has left her village under siege. Too make matters worse North is keeping things from her, important things, like why he choose her, what this is all really about, and about North's mysterious past.

Like I said this book is comparable to Howl's Moving Castle, but it's similar in such a way where the feel of the story is alike without it seeming like you're reading the exact same thing over again. This is a marvelous book that every fan of fantasy books will enjoy. My only complaint is that I cannot find an eBook copy to buy of this book anywhere, and I know it has to be somewhere as I read this through my library's overdrive program. Alas I have resigned myself to buy a physical copy (don't feel too sorry for me it's not as all dramatic as that).

Tamora Pierce: An Author Review

I was going to write a review of all of my favorite Tamora Pierce Novels (i.e. all of them) but I decided to review them all as a whole rather than individually. When I was in the fifth grade I had not yet discovered the incredible world of reading. I read when I had to, and usually short books I was more interested in watching television than reading. (I mean I still love TV but now it had reading to compete with.) A year or so prior my friend had suggested the “Alanna books” for me to read but I forgot about them until one fateful day at my elementary school library. I was browsing for a book and was unable to find anything I liked, so remembering the books my friend Zoë recommended I asked my school librarian, Miss Skibbe (whom I would later work at a Public Library and befriend her sister. Life is weird y’all), and she found the book (Alanna the First Adventure) for me. Still I was determined to stubbornly cling to the “I don’t like to read” persona all the cool kids had, but through a month’s worth of SSR (Silent Selected Reading) time I became addicted. Since the school library did not have the rest of the series, (they had First Test of the Protector of the Small series which I read next and was really confused the whole time) I braved a visit to the public library during the summer reading kickoff party of 2003 with my parents and checked out the next book in the Songs of the Lioness Quartet: In The Hand of the Goddess. What proceeded next was a series of visits to the library to read all the series and then to re-read them a million times until my maternal grandparents bought all of the books for me on my birthday in 2004. 

By the time I was in the sixth grade my teacher tried to encourage me to read something other than Tamora Pierce books to no success. I loved reading, but I was only interested in the Tortall books. I was then introduced to fanfiction and was content for a while longer to continue my Tamora Pierce only reading list. Eventually I did begin to read other books, lots of other books as being monogamous to one series is not within my character. But Tamora Pierce books taught me so much, they taught me about working for your dreams, feminism, sex, relationships, friends, growing up, the feudal system, and so much more. So without much further ado I bring you a cohesive author study thirteen years in the making.

Songs of the Lioness

This series is about a girl Alanna who wishes to become a knight, meanwhile her twin brother Thom has no desire to become a knight and instead wants to study magic. Devising a plan and convincing the adults in their life to keep it secret from their father and the world, they switch places. Alanna cuts her hair and dons the persona of Alan, while Thom goes off to study magic and become a mage.  Alanna discovered training to be a knight and keeping her gender a secret harder than she initially thought, but she sticks to her guns and continues on. She makes new friends while at the Palace in the Tortall capital, Corus. She befriends the Crown Prince Jonathan, his cousin Gary, Raoul, Alex, and the King of Thieves George Cooper among several others. Throughout the first book Alanna deals with the demands of Palace life and her ever changing body. She finds ways to hide her newly grown breasts by binding them first with linen and then with a special corset, and then deals with getting her period for the first time by totally freaking out. I can relate to that last one. She reveals her true gender to first George, then to Prince Jonathan through a series of events that lead her to fight a powerful old race trapped in an abandon city in the desert. By the end of the first book she becomes Jonathan’s squire.

In the second book Alanna is well into her squire years and has become a teenager with all the lovely hormonal changes that brings. She and Jonathan begin a relationship and Alanna works out how she will reveal herself to the court and what she will do after she has been knighted. Alanna’s plans go haywire when Jonathan’s evil cousin the mage Duke Roger concocts a plan to usurp the throne by killing Jonathan and his parents. Alanna uncovers his plans after her Ordeal of Knighthood, injured and tired; she faces the duke and kills him in a trial by combat. (Yeah trial by combat my fellow GoT buds.) She is revealed to be a woman during this fight as well, shocking those who knew her, and confirming what others had suspected all along. Afterwards Alanna leaves the capital to have adventures with her newly earned shield. She winds up in the southern deserts of Tortall fighting the patriarchy. Her and Jonathan reunite and he proposes to her which she ultimately turns down and ends up with George. Her stupid brother brings her arch nemesis back to life because bringing back a traitor with a strong claim to the throne is always a sound plan. In the final book of the series Alanna goes on a quest for a magical stone to bring back to her King. Then she ruins Duke Roger’s plan to usurp the throne again, because who didn’t see that coming?

Don’t mistake my snark for a lack of love for these books; I’m just naturally a snarky person.

The Immortals

This is probably my favorite series Tamora Pierce wrote. This story tells the tale of Veralidane Sarrasri or Daine an orphan in Galla who is picked up by Onua the assistant horse mistress to the Queen’s Riders (think like the King’s Musketeers from ye old France).  Daine discovers she has wild magic, which allows her to talk to animals among other things. She becomes the student of the Great and Powerful Oz Numair Salmalín. She meets familiar characters like Alanna and her husband George, King Jonathan and others we were introduced to in Songs of the Lioness.  Meanwhile the people of Tortall are dealing with immortals being released from the divine realms wreaking havoc all over. Creatures of myth such as centaurs, unicorns, griffins and many more are suddenly thrown back into the mix á la Jurassic Park. Daine discovers who her father is and saves the country along with her friends.

This series is truly one of my favorite of all time. It has magic and romance along with adventure.

Protector of the Small

               

Keladry of Mindelan is the first girl to try for her shield since King Jonathan made it into law that women were allowed to. But she is put on probation because the patriarchy is a bitch. The Lioness, Alanna is not allowed to have any contact with her what so ever because they are afraid she’ll use her witchcraft to magically allow Kel to become a knight. Kel is up for the challenge though. Having been raised in the Yamani Islands (basically Japan to Tortall’s Europe) she already is an outsider and she is use to having to prove her worth. And prove her worth she does through four books of patriarchy smashing feminism, and not the man hating feminism either, actual equality and peace loving feminism! She makes friends new and old and proves that girls are just as good as boys.

What I like most about this series is that while Kel has a few romantic interests that is not the focus. Her gaining her shield is the focus, and then her quest to find the Nothing Man and stop him from using necromancy and murdering children to make terrible war machines. While you may think this is just a rehashing of the Songs of the Lioness series it’s not. Kel is forthwith about her gender and she faces all new problems and some familiar problems we have dealt with before in Tamora Pierce’s books. But Kel has a special place in my heart, and not just because her shield ends up having an owl on it. Cause obviously I love owls, but I adore Kel and her fickle heart because of who she is. 

Daughter of the Lioness

This is the first duology Tamora Pierce wrote in this universe.  This series focuses on Alanna and George’s daughter Alianne or Aly. Aly is at the same time nothing and exactly like her mother. Aly wishes to become a spy for her father and grandfather but they refuse her. It’s too dangerous they say. Aly fights with her father and newly returned mother from the front lines of the Scanian War. Aly then decides she is going on a sailing adventure to give her parents some space while she decides what she wants to be when she grows up. Unfortunately things do not go smoothly; Aly is kidnapped by pirates and sold into slavery in the Copper Isles.

 She is bought by a rich noble family and winds up in a cat and mouse game for the throne. Backed by the Trickster God and her once crow now human love interest Aly stealthily plays the game of thrones (I couldn’t resist the comparison). She works hard to get the daughter of the family of her masters on the throne as queen and stop the race wars happening in the Isles. Eventually she is freed from slavery, and even refuses to go home when her father arrives to bring her home, Aly assures him she is well and not to worry, she has found her place in the world.

This is Caitie’s favorite of the Tamora Pierce Tortall series, and this series were the first books I ever bought the day they were released in hardback.

Beka Cooper

Now this series seems to have several names but according to Goodreads it’s called Beka Cooper so we shall stick with that. I haven’t actually read this series yet, as I am anxious that it won’t be as good as the rest and it will disappoint me, and also because I am a master procrastinator.

This series is about George Cooper’s however many times Great Grandma who worked for the Provost’s Guard, (Like the City Watch in Got, or the local police) which is kind of ironic considering that George becomes the King of Thieves. Though later he become the unofficial Spymaster for King Jonathan after he marries Alanna and forsakes his life of crime. That’s all I know about this series. Eventually I will read it, I own all the books, but I am currently working my way through the Song of Ice and Fire series if you couldn’t tell by my copious GoT references.

Emelan

Tamora Pierce also wrote another series about four mages and their mentors set in the fictional world of Emelan. Now I have read all the books of this 

series but I did not like is as well as the Tortall books. The story follows Sandry, Briar, Tris, and Daja as they navigate the world with their unconventional magic. They find mentors and apprentices of their own as they grow and become formidable mages in their own rights. 

Upcoming Titles

Tamora Pierce has some interesting books she is working on in the Tortall universe. First up are stories about Numair Salmalín when he was still in Carthak and called Arram Draper, which should be interesting to learn the events that lead to him, fleeing to Tortall working as a magician and eventually becoming the friend and ally to King Jonathan. She also has a book coming up about the girl Maura of Dunlath from Wolf-Speaker. Not sure what it will be about, but what I am most excited about is her book that will be about Kel and her squire. At the end of Lady Knight it was heavily implied that Kel would be open to a relationship with Dom, and while I do like that there was less romance in the Protector of the Small series, I am a shipper at heart.

Outlander by Diana Gabaldon: A Book Series and Show Review

***Spoiler Alert*** This post will contain spoilers.

So who else is emotionally compromised after last night's season two finale of STARZ Outlander? (To be fair I was emotionally compromised last season finale too and I have read the first five books.) In a true Doctor Who-esque style we learned that history cannot be changed as there are certain events that must always take place.

But let's take a step back and revisit the books and season one. The year is 1945 and the series starts out with meeting our heroine Claire Randall (played by the fabulous Caitiona Balfe), a British combat nurse during WWII. She and her husband Frank have been separated by duty and the war and now that it is over they are taking a second honeymoon is Scotland. There Claire is whisked away two hundred years into the past to 1743. Claire is taken in by the MacKenzie clan and there she meets the young and handsome Jamie (played by the dashing Sam Heughan). Who is running from the law, but it;s okay it's just the British Army being jerks and such. (Who better to understand the Scottish peoples' dislike of the oppressive and overreaching British army than Americans and their obsessive love for the American Revolution.) Not all of the British soldiers are bad, most are actually decent fellows, but our villain in this tale is Captain Jonathan "Black Jack" Randall, the direct ancestor of Claire's husband Frank (both are played by the incredible Tobais Menzies).

So Claire must hide the fact that she is a time traveler and knows that in a few short years the Jacobite Uprising of '45 will reach a head and that many of her new Scottish friends will die on the battle field at Culloden. She gets closer to Jamie, but remains faithful to her husband Frank, until while she is out with a group of the MacKenzies collecting the rents along with the handsome Jamie, she encounters British soldiers who "invite" her to their garrison and she runs into Black Jack again who is convinced she is a spy due to the oddities surrounding her and her inability to be forthright to protect her time traveling secret. As a British citizen she is ordered to go to Fort William for further questioning. However Dougal MacKenzie knowing the abuse of Black Jack will subject her too decides to marry the "widowed" Claire to Jamie to make her a Scottish citizen instead.

Claire and Jamie marry and their is infatuation and lust between them at first and it develops into love. Their's is a story of love and loss, as Claire eventually returns home to the present for the sake of her and Jamie's unborn child on the day the Battle of Culloden where Jamie intends to fight and die on the battle field. However their story doesn't end there, eventually (20 years later) Claire discovers Jamie survived the battle and goes back to him at the urging of their daughter Brianna Randall whom Frank raised as his own until his death. Claire returns to Jamie and their adventure continues across the Atlantic Ocean in the New World and now their are a separate set of rules as they arrive on the cusp of the Revolution.

This series has wrecked my heart. I love it so dearly and Jamie is one of my many, many book boyfriends. Overall this series is worthwhile, the books kind of drag on for me I have read 5 out of the 9 novels: Outlander, Dragonfly in Amber, Voyager, Drums of Autumn, and the Fiery Cross. (somewhere in the distance you can hear me singing Livin' on a Prayer by Bon Jovi cause whoooooa I'm halfway there!) I don't know how Diana Gabaldon keeps going and finding more story to tell about the Frasers but she does. Though some of this stems from book fatigue on my part. It's not that I am tired of reading about Jamie and Claire (my saved fanfiction links can attest to that) I think it's the other characters that are involved, like Brianna and her husband Roger MacKenzie Wakefield that I don't like as much. Sure I care about them but I am not as emotionally invested in them as Claire and Jamie. Which is why I haven't read any of the novellas, though there is one about Jamie and Ian I am interested in called Virgins and a prequel novel I am excited about.

Despite my book fatigue about this series I do intend to finish it because I am no quitter!

Okay maybe a little bit of a quitter but I refuse to have a DNF (did not finish) list or pile on Goodreads. It's one of my redeeming qualities, I always finish books, movies, and TV shows because there is the chance it might get good. It may take me a while since I am a professional procrastinator but mark me it will be done. Also someone needs to make a time machine so I can go back in time to punch the Bonnie Prince Charlie because he said "mark me" one to many times and hurt my Jamie. 

Game of Thrones: A Song of Ice and Fire

***SPOILER ALERT***  this post will contain some spoilers so beware.

This past Sunday saw what is perhaps the greatest episode of Game of Thrones (GoT) ever. Fans, myself included, were worried about the events that might take place this season because the show has now extended beyond the books George R.R. Martin has published. Thankfully Martin gave show runners D.B. Weiss and and David Benioff the highlights of his next book The Winds of Winter which as of yet still has no publication date. (I am content to wait forever for the books to publish if that means he will stop killing Starks and direwolves!)

This review will mostly deal with Season 6 of the show, if you are not caught up I would suggest reading no further.

Okay are they gone?

Good.

This season saw and incredible amount of Women Getting Shit Done™. Let's start off with my favorite family the Starks. Last season saw Sansa Stark married to the monster Ramsey Bolton and her being raped and abused. This season with the help of Theon Greyjoy. Brienne of Tarth, and Podrick Payne she has reunited with her brother Jon Snow and the Wall. Jon had it pretty rough last season, not only did he witness the cruelty, destruction and horror the White Walkers are capable of at Hardhome, he also was murdered by his brothers of the Night's Watch at the Wall. Jon remained dead (and naked, thanks HBO) for the first two episodes before he was brought back by the Red Woman, Melissandre of Asshai. (Seriously who was surprised? There have been theories of Jon Snow's resurrection since A Dance with Dragons was published in 2011.) Since Jon has served the Night's Watch until his death (technicality) he steps down for the position of Lord Commander after he sees his tratiorus brother's hung.

Jon is then reunited with Sansa (the Stark Reunion gave me life) and they then plan to take Winterfell back from Ramsey Bolton with the help of the Free Folk (Wildlings), and whatever Northern houses they can rally to their cause.

They receive help from Lyanna Mormont of Bear Island and 62 men. Lyanna Mormont wowed us last season when the eight year old told Stannis Baratheon "Bear Island knows no King but the King in the North, whose name is Stark" via a message by raven. She absolutly lived up to her reputation. This little girl has more mettle than any grown ass man in this show. Even with the few houses Sansa and Jon rally to their cause, several remain loyal to House Bolton out of fear (cause Ramsey is bat shit crazy). They find themselves still outnumbered, and Sansa in her desperation calls on Petyr "Littlefinger" Baelish, and the Knights of the Vale for help. This lead me and Caitie screaming at the TV about how only an idiot trusts Littlefinger.

When it comes time to face Ramsey on the battlefield, Rickon Stark is "given a chance" to reach his brother Jon, but of course Ramsey kills him (I kept yelling "SERPENTINE! SERPENTINE!" while he was running. In. A. Straight. Line. Then when Ramsey killed him Caitie was weeping and I was yelling "I WANT HIM DEAD. I WANT HIS FAMILY DEAD AND HIS HOUSE BURNT TO THE GROUND" about Ramsey). The Battle of the Bastards for the title of King in the North rages, Ramsey seems to have the upper hand, Caitie and I are biting our nails in anticipation, waiting to see if Jon can really win. When it begins to look grim, like our heroes will fail, which in this show would be no surprise they were going to once again crush my dreams and ruin my life (Season 3 Episode 9 I'm looking at you), the Knights of the Vale ride in to save the day. But at what cost? We find out the next episode when Littlefinger tells Sansa he wishes to marry her and take the Iron Throne for himself. Sansa shuts him down, reminding me why I love her and that she isn't a total idiot for asking Baelish for help. because she will never trust the backstabbing bastard again. Then thanks to the mettle of Lyanna Mormont, Jon Snow is named King in the North and all the Northern houses pledge allegiance to House Stark once again, as Sansa smiles, pleased with the outcome until she notices Baelish studying her carefully, having tried to turn Sansa against her bastard half-brother.

Speaking of bastards, the finale saw Bran Stark using his greensight to see the Tower of Joy, which has been an event much debated in the fandom shrouded in mystery and the suspected place of Jon Snow's birth. It is where Lyanna Stark was kept after she was taken by Rhaegar Targaryen that began Robert's Rebellion. We saw a glimpse of this earlier in the season, Bran saw his father Ned Stark and co there fighting two prominent member's of the Kingsguard. Ned's allies all die except for himself and Howland Reed. We learn the noble Eddard Stark lied about what happened during the fight at the Tower of Joy, which leads us to the question what else has he lied about. The confirmation of R+L=J is within sight, you can almost taste it, then Bran is pulled from his vision by the Three Eyed Raven (cock tease). Bran uses his greensight to learn more about the White Walkers, that they were created by the Children of the Forest to protect their weirwood trees from being cut down by men. Bran also disobeys the Three Eyed Raven and goes greenseeing alone and meets the dreaded Night's King. Only the Night's King can see him, he gives Bran a mark that allows the White Walkers' Army to breech the safety of the Three Eyed Raven's secret hideout. A huge fight goes down, the Three Eyed Raven died, the Children of the Forest die, Summer, Bran's direwolf dies (HOW DARE THEY) to show that "summer is truly over and winter is here". Hodor dies because Bran is stuck in a greensight vision of when Hodor was young and Meera Reed screaming "hold the door" leeks thorough, young Hodor (whose name is really Wylis) has a seizure and repeatedly screams "hold the door" until it becomes shortened to Hodor. Hodor then dies holding the door so Meera and Bran can escape. (Sob).

But not for long. The wrights of the White Walkers find them and they are rescued by a mysterious black rider who is supposed to be Coldhands from the books but is Benjen Stark who was resurrected from the dead by the Children of the Forest to fight the White Walkers. Benjen takes Bran and Meera to the weirwood tree just north of the Wall, as he is dead and cannot pass through the Wall. Bran uses his greensight again (seriously get south of the Wall kids!) and were are taken back to the Tower of Joy (never mind, stay in danger I need to see this!). Ned runs up the stairs following Lyanna's agonizing screams to see her dying in a bed of blood (I'm hyperventilating and praying at this point). Ned goes to her, yells for the handmaidens in the room to get her water, but Lyanna refuses she then leans into Ned's ear and whispers "His name is -inaudible-. If Robert finds out, he'll kill him. You know he will. You have to protect him. Promise me Ned. Promise me" (I'm screaming in a deep demonic voice "I KNEW IT"). Ned is handed a baby and Lyanna dies, Bran watched all this in confused surprise. R+L=J, and before all you naysayers tell me "but they only confirmed Lyanna is Jon's mother and Rhaegar is not Jon's father take a gander at what HBO put on their blog:

R+L=J bitches!

Onward to events going on across the Narrow Sea with Daenerys Targaryen. Last season she was kidnapped by the Dothraki and taken to Vaes Dorthrak to decided if she is to become a dosh khaleen. During the meeting of the leaders of several khalasars about her fate Dany burns the patriarchy to the ground! Leaves the burning building unharmed and wins the absolute loyalty of all the Dorthraki in one fell swoop. She names her entire khalasar her Bloodriders instead of just three as is tradition. Now with her stronger numbers Dany is able to retake Meereen from the Sons of the Harpy and the Masters, also freeing Yunkai and Astapor. Theon Greyjoy and his sister Asha Yara arrive in Meereen to offer their ships and allegiance to Dany. Dany and Yara flirt a bit and they become allies.  Varys the Spider goes to Dorne and convinces the Martells and Tyrells to join their cause and the finale sees Dany sailing to Westeros from the newly named Bay of Dragons (formerly Slavers Bay) with her new Hand of the Queen Tyrion Lannister surrounded by an armada of Greyjoys, Tyrells, Martells, Dorthraki, the Unsullied, and of course her three dragons, Drogon, Viserion, and Rhaegal.

In King's Landing things aren't so great. Cersei has lost power thanks to the alliance of the Crown and the Faith. Tommen and Margaery have fallen under the spell of the High Sparrow and Faith Militant. Though we find out Margaery is faking it to save her brother Loras. She sends her grandmother Olenna away to save her from the High Sparrow's grasp, only to fall into Cersei's trap. Cersei has stocked a large cache of wildfire under the Great Sept of Baelor. Blowing it up and killing all inside and for several blocks, Margaery, Loras, the Tyrells (minus Olenna), and the High Sparrow and his followers to name a few. Tommen in his despair leaps from his window to his death. Leaving Cersei alone and childless. She then takes the Iron Throne for herself becoming the Mad Queen.

Olenna travels to Dorne to meet with House Martell, well the ladies and Sand portion of it mostly. Olenna slays and Varys appears, and bada bing, bada boom, alliance time.

There was some stuff going on in the Iron Islands with the Kingsmoot, basically Theon supports Yara to become the Queen of the Iron Islands, but their Uncle Euron, who killed their father takes the throne and they flee to Meereen to side with the Dragon Queen.

Now to the Stark I left out, Arya. She has had a hell of a ride this past season. She joined the Faceless Men, she flunked out, rejoined and the left like a BAMF. She learns to see things from another perspective when she goes blind, becomes another person using the faces, and studies a acting troop who's play is about the events in earlier seasons, sympathetic towards the Lannisters. Arya finds herself and decides to return home to Westeros, except the Waif has been charged to kill her. Instead Arya kills her and adds her bloody face to the Faceless Men's trove. Then Arya mic drops and leaves.

When she arrives in Westeros we catch up with her at Twins, the home of House Frey. Where Jaime and Bronn have been most of the season helping the Frey's take back Riverrun from the Blackfish. Arya, in disguise, murders two of Walder Frey's sons and bakes them in a meat pie, then slits Walder's throat.

It's a beautiful day in Westeros. This season has given me hope. A dangerous amount considering the past horrors this show has afflicted us with. Ned's death, The Red Wedding, Sansa's marriage to Ramsey to name a few. But after watching the finale and having my beloved fan theory of R+L=J confirmed I believe again.

I'm excited to see what happens next season, with Dany coming to ruin Cersei's day and take back the Iron Throne, Jon technically being the rightful Targaryen heir to the Iron Throne, and the impending war with the White Walkers. With just two seasons left according to the show runners I don't know how I'm going to survive the next ten months until season 7.

UPDATE 7/10/2016: 

Game of Thrones Season 7 has been pushed back George R.R. Martin style. I am now super grumpy about it, however so long as the next season is a quality season like this past one was I will forgive them their transgressions. 

Labyrinth (1986)

***SPOILER ALERT*** this post will contain some spoilers so beware

Today marks the 30th Anniversary of my favorite movie of all time. Labyrinth (1986) starring Jennifer Connelly, David Bowie and Toby Froud (which coincidentally today is his 32nd birthday as well), created from the mind of Monty Python's Terry Jones, Jim Henson, George Lucas, and Brian and Wendy Froud. So in celebration of this exciting event I am going to review Labyrinth!

The movie starts out with a really cool title sequence featuring the first ever completely CGI animal, a barn owl to the music of David Bowie (Underground from the Labyrinth soundtrack). Then we are taken to a fantastical land where a maiden in a dress runs up to face her adversary and announces that "through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered I have fought my way to the castle beyond the Goblin City to take back the child you have stolen..." she goes on to say the her "...will is a strong as yours, and my kingdom is as great" only to be interrupted by a flash of lightening and responding clash of thunder. Then in a strange turn of events she mumbles what she just say, while still facing her adversary, only to proclaim "damn I can never remember that line!" and pulls a red book titled The Labyrinth out of her sleeve to recall her next line. But it's too late the enchantment has been broken, we discover the maiden is an ordinary teenage girl, her adversary is her faithful dog companion, and the fantastical land is merely a local park. A bell tolls and the girl runs from the park with her dog Merlin through the rain down suburban streets before arriving home to the disappointment of her stepmother (who through the release of  the Return to Labyrinth manga is named Irene but fans had previously dubbed her Karen). We discover the girl, Sarah (Jennifer Connelly) was supposed to be home an hour ago to babysit her half-brother Toby (Toby Froud). Through this interaction and the discovery of her room we learn Sarah is a fifteen year old girl stuck between her fantasy filled childhood, and growing up into a young lady. (Don't do it it's a trap!)

As the night progresses Sarah unwittingly summons the Goblin King, Jareth (David Bowie) to come and take her baby brother. In order to right her wrong she must solve the Labyrinth and defeat the Goblin King in 13 hours or Toby will be (allegedly) turned into a Goblin. Sarah proves to be impatient and inept at solving the mysteries of the Labyrinth, however thanks to some friends she makes along the way

The Worm

Pictured left to right: Sir Didymus, Hoggle, and Ludo

she manages to solve the Labyrinth, defeat Jareth, and rescue Toby. Through all this Sarah finds a happy medium between her fantasies and growing up (Peter Pan is displeased with you Sarah!)

I "discovered" this movie when I was a very young child (so young I don't remember a life without Labyrinth), my cousin Kasi loved the movie so most every time when all of The Cousins™ stayed at our Grandma's we would watch Labyrinth among others like, Magic Island, Princess Bride, Legend, and Ketchup Vampires to name a few.

30 years ago today Labyrinth premiered in theaters in the United States.

and to celebrate that they are releasing a special 30th Anniversary Edition!

As well as several books. They are all available for pre-order on Amazon as most of the anniversary items will be released this fall. Until then you can fill the void with lots of Labyrinth swag already available on Amazon, Ebay, and Etsy! Like this really awesome phone case and wallet combo I purchased (again) when I got my new phone last year. (I own like three of them because it's my case of choice for all the smartphones I have owned).

Picture is taken from Etsy and is not my image

I would give this movie a higher rating than 5 out of 5 if I could (and thus ignoring the scale we have set here at Nerdy Owl Books and rendering it pointless).

UPDATE 6/28/2016:

THEY ARE RELEASING LABYRINTH FUNKOS! GUYS! GUYS! LOOK HOW COOL THEY ARE!!!!! 

This is literally the best thing to happen to me in years!

UPDATE 8/17/2016:

Hot Topic has released a special Hot Topic Exclusive Jareth Funko you can order here

Now all I need is for them to release a version of Sarah in her ballgown and one of Sir Didymus and Ambrosius for my life to be complete... for now.