Outlander by Diana Gabaldon: A Book Series and Show Review

***Spoiler Alert*** This post will contain spoilers.

So who else is emotionally compromised after last night's season two finale of STARZ Outlander? (To be fair I was emotionally compromised last season finale too and I have read the first five books.) In a true Doctor Who-esque style we learned that history cannot be changed as there are certain events that must always take place.

But let's take a step back and revisit the books and season one. The year is 1945 and the series starts out with meeting our heroine Claire Randall (played by the fabulous Caitiona Balfe), a British combat nurse during WWII. She and her husband Frank have been separated by duty and the war and now that it is over they are taking a second honeymoon is Scotland. There Claire is whisked away two hundred years into the past to 1743. Claire is taken in by the MacKenzie clan and there she meets the young and handsome Jamie (played by the dashing Sam Heughan). Who is running from the law, but it;s okay it's just the British Army being jerks and such. (Who better to understand the Scottish peoples' dislike of the oppressive and overreaching British army than Americans and their obsessive love for the American Revolution.) Not all of the British soldiers are bad, most are actually decent fellows, but our villain in this tale is Captain Jonathan "Black Jack" Randall, the direct ancestor of Claire's husband Frank (both are played by the incredible Tobais Menzies).

So Claire must hide the fact that she is a time traveler and knows that in a few short years the Jacobite Uprising of '45 will reach a head and that many of her new Scottish friends will die on the battle field at Culloden. She gets closer to Jamie, but remains faithful to her husband Frank, until while she is out with a group of the MacKenzies collecting the rents along with the handsome Jamie, she encounters British soldiers who "invite" her to their garrison and she runs into Black Jack again who is convinced she is a spy due to the oddities surrounding her and her inability to be forthright to protect her time traveling secret. As a British citizen she is ordered to go to Fort William for further questioning. However Dougal MacKenzie knowing the abuse of Black Jack will subject her too decides to marry the "widowed" Claire to Jamie to make her a Scottish citizen instead.

Claire and Jamie marry and their is infatuation and lust between them at first and it develops into love. Their's is a story of love and loss, as Claire eventually returns home to the present for the sake of her and Jamie's unborn child on the day the Battle of Culloden where Jamie intends to fight and die on the battle field. However their story doesn't end there, eventually (20 years later) Claire discovers Jamie survived the battle and goes back to him at the urging of their daughter Brianna Randall whom Frank raised as his own until his death. Claire returns to Jamie and their adventure continues across the Atlantic Ocean in the New World and now their are a separate set of rules as they arrive on the cusp of the Revolution.

This series has wrecked my heart. I love it so dearly and Jamie is one of my many, many book boyfriends. Overall this series is worthwhile, the books kind of drag on for me I have read 5 out of the 9 novels: Outlander, Dragonfly in Amber, Voyager, Drums of Autumn, and the Fiery Cross. (somewhere in the distance you can hear me singing Livin' on a Prayer by Bon Jovi cause whoooooa I'm halfway there!) I don't know how Diana Gabaldon keeps going and finding more story to tell about the Frasers but she does. Though some of this stems from book fatigue on my part. It's not that I am tired of reading about Jamie and Claire (my saved fanfiction links can attest to that) I think it's the other characters that are involved, like Brianna and her husband Roger MacKenzie Wakefield that I don't like as much. Sure I care about them but I am not as emotionally invested in them as Claire and Jamie. Which is why I haven't read any of the novellas, though there is one about Jamie and Ian I am interested in called Virgins and a prequel novel I am excited about.

Despite my book fatigue about this series I do intend to finish it because I am no quitter!

Okay maybe a little bit of a quitter but I refuse to have a DNF (did not finish) list or pile on Goodreads. It's one of my redeeming qualities, I always finish books, movies, and TV shows because there is the chance it might get good. It may take me a while since I am a professional procrastinator but mark me it will be done. Also someone needs to make a time machine so I can go back in time to punch the Bonnie Prince Charlie because he said "mark me" one to many times and hurt my Jamie. 

Game of Thrones: A Song of Ice and Fire

***SPOILER ALERT***  this post will contain some spoilers so beware.

This past Sunday saw what is perhaps the greatest episode of Game of Thrones (GoT) ever. Fans, myself included, were worried about the events that might take place this season because the show has now extended beyond the books George R.R. Martin has published. Thankfully Martin gave show runners D.B. Weiss and and David Benioff the highlights of his next book The Winds of Winter which as of yet still has no publication date. (I am content to wait forever for the books to publish if that means he will stop killing Starks and direwolves!)

This review will mostly deal with Season 6 of the show, if you are not caught up I would suggest reading no further.

Okay are they gone?

Good.

This season saw and incredible amount of Women Getting Shit Done™. Let's start off with my favorite family the Starks. Last season saw Sansa Stark married to the monster Ramsey Bolton and her being raped and abused. This season with the help of Theon Greyjoy. Brienne of Tarth, and Podrick Payne she has reunited with her brother Jon Snow and the Wall. Jon had it pretty rough last season, not only did he witness the cruelty, destruction and horror the White Walkers are capable of at Hardhome, he also was murdered by his brothers of the Night's Watch at the Wall. Jon remained dead (and naked, thanks HBO) for the first two episodes before he was brought back by the Red Woman, Melissandre of Asshai. (Seriously who was surprised? There have been theories of Jon Snow's resurrection since A Dance with Dragons was published in 2011.) Since Jon has served the Night's Watch until his death (technicality) he steps down for the position of Lord Commander after he sees his tratiorus brother's hung.

Jon is then reunited with Sansa (the Stark Reunion gave me life) and they then plan to take Winterfell back from Ramsey Bolton with the help of the Free Folk (Wildlings), and whatever Northern houses they can rally to their cause.

They receive help from Lyanna Mormont of Bear Island and 62 men. Lyanna Mormont wowed us last season when the eight year old told Stannis Baratheon "Bear Island knows no King but the King in the North, whose name is Stark" via a message by raven. She absolutly lived up to her reputation. This little girl has more mettle than any grown ass man in this show. Even with the few houses Sansa and Jon rally to their cause, several remain loyal to House Bolton out of fear (cause Ramsey is bat shit crazy). They find themselves still outnumbered, and Sansa in her desperation calls on Petyr "Littlefinger" Baelish, and the Knights of the Vale for help. This lead me and Caitie screaming at the TV about how only an idiot trusts Littlefinger.

When it comes time to face Ramsey on the battlefield, Rickon Stark is "given a chance" to reach his brother Jon, but of course Ramsey kills him (I kept yelling "SERPENTINE! SERPENTINE!" while he was running. In. A. Straight. Line. Then when Ramsey killed him Caitie was weeping and I was yelling "I WANT HIM DEAD. I WANT HIS FAMILY DEAD AND HIS HOUSE BURNT TO THE GROUND" about Ramsey). The Battle of the Bastards for the title of King in the North rages, Ramsey seems to have the upper hand, Caitie and I are biting our nails in anticipation, waiting to see if Jon can really win. When it begins to look grim, like our heroes will fail, which in this show would be no surprise they were going to once again crush my dreams and ruin my life (Season 3 Episode 9 I'm looking at you), the Knights of the Vale ride in to save the day. But at what cost? We find out the next episode when Littlefinger tells Sansa he wishes to marry her and take the Iron Throne for himself. Sansa shuts him down, reminding me why I love her and that she isn't a total idiot for asking Baelish for help. because she will never trust the backstabbing bastard again. Then thanks to the mettle of Lyanna Mormont, Jon Snow is named King in the North and all the Northern houses pledge allegiance to House Stark once again, as Sansa smiles, pleased with the outcome until she notices Baelish studying her carefully, having tried to turn Sansa against her bastard half-brother.

Speaking of bastards, the finale saw Bran Stark using his greensight to see the Tower of Joy, which has been an event much debated in the fandom shrouded in mystery and the suspected place of Jon Snow's birth. It is where Lyanna Stark was kept after she was taken by Rhaegar Targaryen that began Robert's Rebellion. We saw a glimpse of this earlier in the season, Bran saw his father Ned Stark and co there fighting two prominent member's of the Kingsguard. Ned's allies all die except for himself and Howland Reed. We learn the noble Eddard Stark lied about what happened during the fight at the Tower of Joy, which leads us to the question what else has he lied about. The confirmation of R+L=J is within sight, you can almost taste it, then Bran is pulled from his vision by the Three Eyed Raven (cock tease). Bran uses his greensight to learn more about the White Walkers, that they were created by the Children of the Forest to protect their weirwood trees from being cut down by men. Bran also disobeys the Three Eyed Raven and goes greenseeing alone and meets the dreaded Night's King. Only the Night's King can see him, he gives Bran a mark that allows the White Walkers' Army to breech the safety of the Three Eyed Raven's secret hideout. A huge fight goes down, the Three Eyed Raven died, the Children of the Forest die, Summer, Bran's direwolf dies (HOW DARE THEY) to show that "summer is truly over and winter is here". Hodor dies because Bran is stuck in a greensight vision of when Hodor was young and Meera Reed screaming "hold the door" leeks thorough, young Hodor (whose name is really Wylis) has a seizure and repeatedly screams "hold the door" until it becomes shortened to Hodor. Hodor then dies holding the door so Meera and Bran can escape. (Sob).

But not for long. The wrights of the White Walkers find them and they are rescued by a mysterious black rider who is supposed to be Coldhands from the books but is Benjen Stark who was resurrected from the dead by the Children of the Forest to fight the White Walkers. Benjen takes Bran and Meera to the weirwood tree just north of the Wall, as he is dead and cannot pass through the Wall. Bran uses his greensight again (seriously get south of the Wall kids!) and were are taken back to the Tower of Joy (never mind, stay in danger I need to see this!). Ned runs up the stairs following Lyanna's agonizing screams to see her dying in a bed of blood (I'm hyperventilating and praying at this point). Ned goes to her, yells for the handmaidens in the room to get her water, but Lyanna refuses she then leans into Ned's ear and whispers "His name is -inaudible-. If Robert finds out, he'll kill him. You know he will. You have to protect him. Promise me Ned. Promise me" (I'm screaming in a deep demonic voice "I KNEW IT"). Ned is handed a baby and Lyanna dies, Bran watched all this in confused surprise. R+L=J, and before all you naysayers tell me "but they only confirmed Lyanna is Jon's mother and Rhaegar is not Jon's father take a gander at what HBO put on their blog:

R+L=J bitches!

Onward to events going on across the Narrow Sea with Daenerys Targaryen. Last season she was kidnapped by the Dothraki and taken to Vaes Dorthrak to decided if she is to become a dosh khaleen. During the meeting of the leaders of several khalasars about her fate Dany burns the patriarchy to the ground! Leaves the burning building unharmed and wins the absolute loyalty of all the Dorthraki in one fell swoop. She names her entire khalasar her Bloodriders instead of just three as is tradition. Now with her stronger numbers Dany is able to retake Meereen from the Sons of the Harpy and the Masters, also freeing Yunkai and Astapor. Theon Greyjoy and his sister Asha Yara arrive in Meereen to offer their ships and allegiance to Dany. Dany and Yara flirt a bit and they become allies.  Varys the Spider goes to Dorne and convinces the Martells and Tyrells to join their cause and the finale sees Dany sailing to Westeros from the newly named Bay of Dragons (formerly Slavers Bay) with her new Hand of the Queen Tyrion Lannister surrounded by an armada of Greyjoys, Tyrells, Martells, Dorthraki, the Unsullied, and of course her three dragons, Drogon, Viserion, and Rhaegal.

In King's Landing things aren't so great. Cersei has lost power thanks to the alliance of the Crown and the Faith. Tommen and Margaery have fallen under the spell of the High Sparrow and Faith Militant. Though we find out Margaery is faking it to save her brother Loras. She sends her grandmother Olenna away to save her from the High Sparrow's grasp, only to fall into Cersei's trap. Cersei has stocked a large cache of wildfire under the Great Sept of Baelor. Blowing it up and killing all inside and for several blocks, Margaery, Loras, the Tyrells (minus Olenna), and the High Sparrow and his followers to name a few. Tommen in his despair leaps from his window to his death. Leaving Cersei alone and childless. She then takes the Iron Throne for herself becoming the Mad Queen.

Olenna travels to Dorne to meet with House Martell, well the ladies and Sand portion of it mostly. Olenna slays and Varys appears, and bada bing, bada boom, alliance time.

There was some stuff going on in the Iron Islands with the Kingsmoot, basically Theon supports Yara to become the Queen of the Iron Islands, but their Uncle Euron, who killed their father takes the throne and they flee to Meereen to side with the Dragon Queen.

Now to the Stark I left out, Arya. She has had a hell of a ride this past season. She joined the Faceless Men, she flunked out, rejoined and the left like a BAMF. She learns to see things from another perspective when she goes blind, becomes another person using the faces, and studies a acting troop who's play is about the events in earlier seasons, sympathetic towards the Lannisters. Arya finds herself and decides to return home to Westeros, except the Waif has been charged to kill her. Instead Arya kills her and adds her bloody face to the Faceless Men's trove. Then Arya mic drops and leaves.

When she arrives in Westeros we catch up with her at Twins, the home of House Frey. Where Jaime and Bronn have been most of the season helping the Frey's take back Riverrun from the Blackfish. Arya, in disguise, murders two of Walder Frey's sons and bakes them in a meat pie, then slits Walder's throat.

It's a beautiful day in Westeros. This season has given me hope. A dangerous amount considering the past horrors this show has afflicted us with. Ned's death, The Red Wedding, Sansa's marriage to Ramsey to name a few. But after watching the finale and having my beloved fan theory of R+L=J confirmed I believe again.

I'm excited to see what happens next season, with Dany coming to ruin Cersei's day and take back the Iron Throne, Jon technically being the rightful Targaryen heir to the Iron Throne, and the impending war with the White Walkers. With just two seasons left according to the show runners I don't know how I'm going to survive the next ten months until season 7.

UPDATE 7/10/2016: 

Game of Thrones Season 7 has been pushed back George R.R. Martin style. I am now super grumpy about it, however so long as the next season is a quality season like this past one was I will forgive them their transgressions. 

Labyrinth (1986)

***SPOILER ALERT*** this post will contain some spoilers so beware

Today marks the 30th Anniversary of my favorite movie of all time. Labyrinth (1986) starring Jennifer Connelly, David Bowie and Toby Froud (which coincidentally today is his 32nd birthday as well), created from the mind of Monty Python's Terry Jones, Jim Henson, George Lucas, and Brian and Wendy Froud. So in celebration of this exciting event I am going to review Labyrinth!

The movie starts out with a really cool title sequence featuring the first ever completely CGI animal, a barn owl to the music of David Bowie (Underground from the Labyrinth soundtrack). Then we are taken to a fantastical land where a maiden in a dress runs up to face her adversary and announces that "through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered I have fought my way to the castle beyond the Goblin City to take back the child you have stolen..." she goes on to say the her "...will is a strong as yours, and my kingdom is as great" only to be interrupted by a flash of lightening and responding clash of thunder. Then in a strange turn of events she mumbles what she just say, while still facing her adversary, only to proclaim "damn I can never remember that line!" and pulls a red book titled The Labyrinth out of her sleeve to recall her next line. But it's too late the enchantment has been broken, we discover the maiden is an ordinary teenage girl, her adversary is her faithful dog companion, and the fantastical land is merely a local park. A bell tolls and the girl runs from the park with her dog Merlin through the rain down suburban streets before arriving home to the disappointment of her stepmother (who through the release of  the Return to Labyrinth manga is named Irene but fans had previously dubbed her Karen). We discover the girl, Sarah (Jennifer Connelly) was supposed to be home an hour ago to babysit her half-brother Toby (Toby Froud). Through this interaction and the discovery of her room we learn Sarah is a fifteen year old girl stuck between her fantasy filled childhood, and growing up into a young lady. (Don't do it it's a trap!)

As the night progresses Sarah unwittingly summons the Goblin King, Jareth (David Bowie) to come and take her baby brother. In order to right her wrong she must solve the Labyrinth and defeat the Goblin King in 13 hours or Toby will be (allegedly) turned into a Goblin. Sarah proves to be impatient and inept at solving the mysteries of the Labyrinth, however thanks to some friends she makes along the way

The Worm

Pictured left to right: Sir Didymus, Hoggle, and Ludo

she manages to solve the Labyrinth, defeat Jareth, and rescue Toby. Through all this Sarah finds a happy medium between her fantasies and growing up (Peter Pan is displeased with you Sarah!)

I "discovered" this movie when I was a very young child (so young I don't remember a life without Labyrinth), my cousin Kasi loved the movie so most every time when all of The Cousins™ stayed at our Grandma's we would watch Labyrinth among others like, Magic Island, Princess Bride, Legend, and Ketchup Vampires to name a few.

30 years ago today Labyrinth premiered in theaters in the United States.

and to celebrate that they are releasing a special 30th Anniversary Edition!

As well as several books. They are all available for pre-order on Amazon as most of the anniversary items will be released this fall. Until then you can fill the void with lots of Labyrinth swag already available on Amazon, Ebay, and Etsy! Like this really awesome phone case and wallet combo I purchased (again) when I got my new phone last year. (I own like three of them because it's my case of choice for all the smartphones I have owned).

Picture is taken from Etsy and is not my image

I would give this movie a higher rating than 5 out of 5 if I could (and thus ignoring the scale we have set here at Nerdy Owl Books and rendering it pointless).

UPDATE 6/28/2016:

THEY ARE RELEASING LABYRINTH FUNKOS! GUYS! GUYS! LOOK HOW COOL THEY ARE!!!!! 

This is literally the best thing to happen to me in years!

UPDATE 8/17/2016:

Hot Topic has released a special Hot Topic Exclusive Jareth Funko you can order here

Now all I need is for them to release a version of Sarah in her ballgown and one of Sir Didymus and Ambrosius for my life to be complete... for now. 

The Beast by Lindsay Mead

This so far has been my favorite Beauty and the Beast retelling. It was slow at first the book's opening heavily focused on world-building that payed off in the end. The places that the book describes are explained with enough magic and fantasy ground in reality to make it seem like a real place. The characters are the usual suspects, Belle, Gaston, Belle's father, the Beast, but these characters that have appeared in various stories for well over a century have a fresh feeling. Belle is still the girl we know who wants adventure it the great wide somewhere, but she is also a kick ass hunter who somehow also remains a lady. It's refreshing to have a female lead in a book who is equal parts bad ass, but does so in a fancy dress with minimal complaint. Then there is Gastone (aka Gaston) who I really dislike because of the Disney movie, but he proved to actually be an okay guy. He's still arrogant, but acceptably so. Belle's father is still an inventor but also the leader of a group of hunters that have been charged by the Catholic Church to find and kill hellhounds (kind of like werewolves or black dogs for my paranormally inclined readers). Then there's the Beast. The Prince Aleksander from the neighboring kingdom of Vakre Fjell and his entire kingdom is cursed. Those outside of the protection of the palace turn into hellhounds and those within the palace are trapped. The prince himself has been turned into a "hideous" beast and can only communicate with people through their shared dreams using magic.

The books is incredibly well written, and minus a few questions I have (like how does this shared dreaming thing work, and if everyone is trapped in the palace grounds and can't leave, how and where do they get their food and supplies for all their finery?) it's a well thought out world and concept. I can't wait for the sequels to be published. You can support the author here.

Withering Rose by Kaitlyn Davis

A big thanks to Netgalley for letting me receive a copy for free for an honest review.

This book was amazing, it was reminiscent of the 10th Kingdom miniseries and book I love so much. The premise of this series is that their was a parallel universe to ours that was full of magic and fairy tale like wonder (read: horror). But due to an earthquake in both multiverses they collide and form a new world that is a combination of both, and of course the natives of Earth are afraid of the magic that comes with the new inhabitants and decide to hunt them down and remove magic from the world. Kind of like the European Witch Hunts. The main character Omorose is an unfortunate magic user who must hide her magic abilities and forsake them because she would be killed if she was discovered, and also she is cursed. Every time she uses her ability she losses time and it shortens her life. So in a desperate attempt at freedom to use her magic, or rid herself of it forever she escapes to the Beast's kingdom, who the Earthling's and Fairy Tale people both fear.

Overall I really enjoyed this book. I'm definitely adding the rest of this series to my TBR list. What I liked most about this story is the complexity of the world the author has created. It's part dystopian and part high fantasy. The characters could use a little more depth, they seem a little flat at times, and their backstories get a little confusing as they are glossed over. However I absolutely loved the idea that magic users suffer a curse, because magic costs something, and I like the reason behind the curse. I was conflicted over the Earthling's reaction to magic existing and how they are so untrusting of the people from the fairy tale world, but the more I thought about it the more I realized that it was a very accurate response. People were afraid of something they had no control over, and they did what they always do. They hunt it down and kill it. Case in point, the Salem Witch Trials. The persecution of the Protestants by the Catholic Church, the Spanish Inquisition. So while I would like to believe that people would be more accepting in circumstances such as the ones presented in the book, history has shown again and again that that would not be the case.

The Musketeers

***SPOILER ALERT*** this post will contain some spoilers so beware.

I have found a new favorite TV show in the form of this swashbuckling adventure The Musketeers from BBC based on the classic tale The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas. The show differs from the book I am told. (I'm still waiting for my copy of the book I ordered from Amazon to arrive so I can confirm the differences for myself.) 

The show begins with two travelers in the rain who are on their way to Paris to petition the King to lower taxes as their farming community in Gascony can no longer afford the burden. They stop at an inn at the insistence of the younger traveler as his father is tired and he can tell. This proves fatal. Furthering my belief that motels on the side of the road are murder traps! I digress... the pair, as well as other guests of the inn are set upon by bandits claiming to be Musketeers led by Athos. (I saw this, and having the firm conviction that the Musketeers where all honorable and whatnot I starting singing the "mmm why you lying" song to myself.) The young boy attacks the bandits but they get away, he apologizes to his father, only for his father to collapse and die from a bullet wound, his last words being "Athos". The young boy with the now tragic backstory making him a main character is D'Artagnan, played by Luke Pasqualino.

(What a hottie). He continues on to Paris to find Athos and kill him for murdering his father (it's the 1630s and while dueling is currently illegal in France, his honor demands satisfaction and revenge, or whatever). Then we are taken to Paris to meet the Inseparables (aka the Three Musketeers): Athos (Tom Burke) , Porthos (Howard Charles), and Aramis (Santiago Cabrera).

(Again, what hotties, though Aramis is my favorite, look at that beard, it's so Errol Flynn.) Who are being ordered by Captain Treville to find a missing group of Musketeers.

D'Artagnan has arrived in Paris, in which he is chased and forced to jump from a window to escape being wanted for a murder he didn't commit, framed by a "completely unimportant" lady he meets in a inn. He finds a cute girl and offers to pay her to kiss him. Which allows him to escape and then face the wrath of Madame Constance Bonacieux. 

Seriously I wouldn't mess with her. D'Artagnan collapses, you know because he jumped through a window like an idiot. A brave idiot, but seriously, don't jump out windows guys, even if you're running for your life, you're more than likely to break your leg, or other bones that would hinder said escape more than help. Anyways Constance helps D'Artagnan and then he goes off to find Athos because he has a one track mind. So D'Artagnan appears in the Musketeer Garrison courtyard and loudly asks for Athos of the King's Musketeers, when Athos, the real Athos, confirms who he is, D'Artagnan challenges Athos to a duel saying one of them will die here, and illegal dueling ensues. D'Artagnan proves to be a skillful swordsman, if not a little rough around the edges, but is no match for Athos, or Aramis and Porthos when they join in. The madness is stopped by Constance who arrives to scold them for fighting, Athos continues to insist he is not the man D'Artagnan is looking for, this is all interrupted by Captain Treville

and some Red Guards who are there to arrest Athos for murders and robbery. D'Artagnan convinced there is more to his father's murder than meets the eye agrees to investigate with Porthos and Aramis to clear Athos name and figure out the mystery of the rouge Musketeers, and the missing troop of Musketeers, which shocker are all related. (I really do love this show, I'm just a sarcastic little shit.) 

The show has a villain of the week set-up, as well as a big overall baddie who is usually behind most of the other villains, In season one the "villain" is the Cardinal Armand Jean du Plessis, Duke of Richelieu played by the ever perfect Peter Capaldi.

Season two the villain is Douchefort Rochefort.

And season three has these two guys, Lucien Grimaud and Maquis de Feron.

Throughout all their adventure the Musketeers forge a strong bond of friendship while serving their King and Queen.

\

Aramis really serves his Queen y'all

Yea that's right the Dauphin (Prince of France) is Aramis' son, not the King's, which differs from the book (so I am told) but I like the star crossed/forbidden lovers story line. All the characters have some pretty set character traits; Aramis is the romantic hero archetype who woos women and is suave and debonair but also a swashbuckling hero in this gunpowder fantasy. Athos the brooding drunk who is the one in charge of this group. Porthos the former Court of Miracles thief with a heart of gold, cheats at cards, and is basically strong as an ox. D'Artagnan is the rookie farm boy, rough but promising which completes this team of Inseparables, and of course you all know the Musketeers motto:

Just kidding, we all know it's:

I could literally spend all day looking up and posting images of Aramis, he's my favorite.

But I shall leave it at this. While sometimes the plot of the Musketeers gets a little convoluted, or implausible, overall I really like it. It's semi-historical, it has romance...fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles- oh sorry that's The Princess Bride, excuse me. *Ahem* It has romance, adventure, fencing, etc, but no giants or monsters really, and as for miracles and true love, well you'll just have to decide that for yourself. 

The Hollow Kingdom by Clare B. Dunkle

***SPOLIER ALERT*** this post will contain some spoilers so beware.

Something I discovered at work one day while shelving books. Once again I was captured by the premise of "goblins". The book tells the story of two sisters who are moving to a remote estate after the death of their father. Older sister Kate and her younger sister Emily move to Hallow Hill (where for thousands of years young women have been disappearing) with their cold guardian, and cousin who is determined to take back Hallow Hill as his own inheritance instead of the girls' at all costs. As luck would have it shortly after arriving Kate begins talking "nonsense" about a Goblin King named Marak Sixfinger who intends to kidnap her and make her his wife, as is the goblin custom to kidnap their brides (one of my favorite tropes). Kate is inexplicably good at avoiding capture, until her cousin in an attempt to force Kate into a Mental Asylum, convinces Kate that her sister has been kidnapped by the goblins, hoping for a reaction from her that would permit him to have her taken away and unable to inherit the estate. However Kate keeps her calm and walks right into the underground kingdom of the goblins and offers herself to Marak in exchange for her sister's safe return. (Be careful with how you word things when dealing with mythical creatures y'all!) Marak agrees and then reveals he has not taken her sister but it was, in fact, their cousin. So Marak and some goblins go and rescue Emily who once rescued demands she too be taken underground with the goblins because she refuses to be separated from Kate. So Kate marries the Goblin King and adventure ensues. I won't reveal the rest, and leave it for you to read and enjoy yourself.

Overall this was a good read. It it targeted towards middle grade readers so it tends to gloss over some topics, particularly the repercussions and implications of kidnapping brides. I would have enjoyed a more in-depth look at that. I would recommend this book to my fellow Labyrinth enthusiasts.