Tamora Pierce: An Author Review

I was going to write a review of all of my favorite Tamora Pierce Novels (i.e. all of them) but I decided to review them all as a whole rather than individually. When I was in the fifth grade I had not yet discovered the incredible world of reading. I read when I had to, and usually short books I was more interested in watching television than reading. (I mean I still love TV but now it had reading to compete with.) A year or so prior my friend had suggested the “Alanna books” for me to read but I forgot about them until one fateful day at my elementary school library. I was browsing for a book and was unable to find anything I liked, so remembering the books my friend Zoë recommended I asked my school librarian, Miss Skibbe (whom I would later work at a Public Library and befriend her sister. Life is weird y’all), and she found the book (Alanna the First Adventure) for me. Still I was determined to stubbornly cling to the “I don’t like to read” persona all the cool kids had, but through a month’s worth of SSR (Silent Selected Reading) time I became addicted. Since the school library did not have the rest of the series, (they had First Test of the Protector of the Small series which I read next and was really confused the whole time) I braved a visit to the public library during the summer reading kickoff party of 2003 with my parents and checked out the next book in the Songs of the Lioness Quartet: In The Hand of the Goddess. What proceeded next was a series of visits to the library to read all the series and then to re-read them a million times until my maternal grandparents bought all of the books for me on my birthday in 2004. 

By the time I was in the sixth grade my teacher tried to encourage me to read something other than Tamora Pierce books to no success. I loved reading, but I was only interested in the Tortall books. I was then introduced to fanfiction and was content for a while longer to continue my Tamora Pierce only reading list. Eventually I did begin to read other books, lots of other books as being monogamous to one series is not within my character. But Tamora Pierce books taught me so much, they taught me about working for your dreams, feminism, sex, relationships, friends, growing up, the feudal system, and so much more. So without much further ado I bring you a cohesive author study thirteen years in the making.

Songs of the Lioness

This series is about a girl Alanna who wishes to become a knight, meanwhile her twin brother Thom has no desire to become a knight and instead wants to study magic. Devising a plan and convincing the adults in their life to keep it secret from their father and the world, they switch places. Alanna cuts her hair and dons the persona of Alan, while Thom goes off to study magic and become a mage.  Alanna discovered training to be a knight and keeping her gender a secret harder than she initially thought, but she sticks to her guns and continues on. She makes new friends while at the Palace in the Tortall capital, Corus. She befriends the Crown Prince Jonathan, his cousin Gary, Raoul, Alex, and the King of Thieves George Cooper among several others. Throughout the first book Alanna deals with the demands of Palace life and her ever changing body. She finds ways to hide her newly grown breasts by binding them first with linen and then with a special corset, and then deals with getting her period for the first time by totally freaking out. I can relate to that last one. She reveals her true gender to first George, then to Prince Jonathan through a series of events that lead her to fight a powerful old race trapped in an abandon city in the desert. By the end of the first book she becomes Jonathan’s squire.

In the second book Alanna is well into her squire years and has become a teenager with all the lovely hormonal changes that brings. She and Jonathan begin a relationship and Alanna works out how she will reveal herself to the court and what she will do after she has been knighted. Alanna’s plans go haywire when Jonathan’s evil cousin the mage Duke Roger concocts a plan to usurp the throne by killing Jonathan and his parents. Alanna uncovers his plans after her Ordeal of Knighthood, injured and tired; she faces the duke and kills him in a trial by combat. (Yeah trial by combat my fellow GoT buds.) She is revealed to be a woman during this fight as well, shocking those who knew her, and confirming what others had suspected all along. Afterwards Alanna leaves the capital to have adventures with her newly earned shield. She winds up in the southern deserts of Tortall fighting the patriarchy. Her and Jonathan reunite and he proposes to her which she ultimately turns down and ends up with George. Her stupid brother brings her arch nemesis back to life because bringing back a traitor with a strong claim to the throne is always a sound plan. In the final book of the series Alanna goes on a quest for a magical stone to bring back to her King. Then she ruins Duke Roger’s plan to usurp the throne again, because who didn’t see that coming?

Don’t mistake my snark for a lack of love for these books; I’m just naturally a snarky person.

The Immortals

This is probably my favorite series Tamora Pierce wrote. This story tells the tale of Veralidane Sarrasri or Daine an orphan in Galla who is picked up by Onua the assistant horse mistress to the Queen’s Riders (think like the King’s Musketeers from ye old France).  Daine discovers she has wild magic, which allows her to talk to animals among other things. She becomes the student of the Great and Powerful Oz Numair Salmalín. She meets familiar characters like Alanna and her husband George, King Jonathan and others we were introduced to in Songs of the Lioness.  Meanwhile the people of Tortall are dealing with immortals being released from the divine realms wreaking havoc all over. Creatures of myth such as centaurs, unicorns, griffins and many more are suddenly thrown back into the mix á la Jurassic Park. Daine discovers who her father is and saves the country along with her friends.

This series is truly one of my favorite of all time. It has magic and romance along with adventure.

Protector of the Small

               

Keladry of Mindelan is the first girl to try for her shield since King Jonathan made it into law that women were allowed to. But she is put on probation because the patriarchy is a bitch. The Lioness, Alanna is not allowed to have any contact with her what so ever because they are afraid she’ll use her witchcraft to magically allow Kel to become a knight. Kel is up for the challenge though. Having been raised in the Yamani Islands (basically Japan to Tortall’s Europe) she already is an outsider and she is use to having to prove her worth. And prove her worth she does through four books of patriarchy smashing feminism, and not the man hating feminism either, actual equality and peace loving feminism! She makes friends new and old and proves that girls are just as good as boys.

What I like most about this series is that while Kel has a few romantic interests that is not the focus. Her gaining her shield is the focus, and then her quest to find the Nothing Man and stop him from using necromancy and murdering children to make terrible war machines. While you may think this is just a rehashing of the Songs of the Lioness series it’s not. Kel is forthwith about her gender and she faces all new problems and some familiar problems we have dealt with before in Tamora Pierce’s books. But Kel has a special place in my heart, and not just because her shield ends up having an owl on it. Cause obviously I love owls, but I adore Kel and her fickle heart because of who she is. 

Daughter of the Lioness

This is the first duology Tamora Pierce wrote in this universe.  This series focuses on Alanna and George’s daughter Alianne or Aly. Aly is at the same time nothing and exactly like her mother. Aly wishes to become a spy for her father and grandfather but they refuse her. It’s too dangerous they say. Aly fights with her father and newly returned mother from the front lines of the Scanian War. Aly then decides she is going on a sailing adventure to give her parents some space while she decides what she wants to be when she grows up. Unfortunately things do not go smoothly; Aly is kidnapped by pirates and sold into slavery in the Copper Isles.

 She is bought by a rich noble family and winds up in a cat and mouse game for the throne. Backed by the Trickster God and her once crow now human love interest Aly stealthily plays the game of thrones (I couldn’t resist the comparison). She works hard to get the daughter of the family of her masters on the throne as queen and stop the race wars happening in the Isles. Eventually she is freed from slavery, and even refuses to go home when her father arrives to bring her home, Aly assures him she is well and not to worry, she has found her place in the world.

This is Caitie’s favorite of the Tamora Pierce Tortall series, and this series were the first books I ever bought the day they were released in hardback.

Beka Cooper

Now this series seems to have several names but according to Goodreads it’s called Beka Cooper so we shall stick with that. I haven’t actually read this series yet, as I am anxious that it won’t be as good as the rest and it will disappoint me, and also because I am a master procrastinator.

This series is about George Cooper’s however many times Great Grandma who worked for the Provost’s Guard, (Like the City Watch in Got, or the local police) which is kind of ironic considering that George becomes the King of Thieves. Though later he become the unofficial Spymaster for King Jonathan after he marries Alanna and forsakes his life of crime. That’s all I know about this series. Eventually I will read it, I own all the books, but I am currently working my way through the Song of Ice and Fire series if you couldn’t tell by my copious GoT references.

Emelan

Tamora Pierce also wrote another series about four mages and their mentors set in the fictional world of Emelan. Now I have read all the books of this 

series but I did not like is as well as the Tortall books. The story follows Sandry, Briar, Tris, and Daja as they navigate the world with their unconventional magic. They find mentors and apprentices of their own as they grow and become formidable mages in their own rights. 

Upcoming Titles

Tamora Pierce has some interesting books she is working on in the Tortall universe. First up are stories about Numair Salmalín when he was still in Carthak and called Arram Draper, which should be interesting to learn the events that lead to him, fleeing to Tortall working as a magician and eventually becoming the friend and ally to King Jonathan. She also has a book coming up about the girl Maura of Dunlath from Wolf-Speaker. Not sure what it will be about, but what I am most excited about is her book that will be about Kel and her squire. At the end of Lady Knight it was heavily implied that Kel would be open to a relationship with Dom, and while I do like that there was less romance in the Protector of the Small series, I am a shipper at heart.

Outlander by Diana Gabaldon: A Book Series and Show Review

***Spoiler Alert*** This post will contain spoilers.

So who else is emotionally compromised after last night's season two finale of STARZ Outlander? (To be fair I was emotionally compromised last season finale too and I have read the first five books.) In a true Doctor Who-esque style we learned that history cannot be changed as there are certain events that must always take place.

But let's take a step back and revisit the books and season one. The year is 1945 and the series starts out with meeting our heroine Claire Randall (played by the fabulous Caitiona Balfe), a British combat nurse during WWII. She and her husband Frank have been separated by duty and the war and now that it is over they are taking a second honeymoon is Scotland. There Claire is whisked away two hundred years into the past to 1743. Claire is taken in by the MacKenzie clan and there she meets the young and handsome Jamie (played by the dashing Sam Heughan). Who is running from the law, but it;s okay it's just the British Army being jerks and such. (Who better to understand the Scottish peoples' dislike of the oppressive and overreaching British army than Americans and their obsessive love for the American Revolution.) Not all of the British soldiers are bad, most are actually decent fellows, but our villain in this tale is Captain Jonathan "Black Jack" Randall, the direct ancestor of Claire's husband Frank (both are played by the incredible Tobais Menzies).

So Claire must hide the fact that she is a time traveler and knows that in a few short years the Jacobite Uprising of '45 will reach a head and that many of her new Scottish friends will die on the battle field at Culloden. She gets closer to Jamie, but remains faithful to her husband Frank, until while she is out with a group of the MacKenzies collecting the rents along with the handsome Jamie, she encounters British soldiers who "invite" her to their garrison and she runs into Black Jack again who is convinced she is a spy due to the oddities surrounding her and her inability to be forthright to protect her time traveling secret. As a British citizen she is ordered to go to Fort William for further questioning. However Dougal MacKenzie knowing the abuse of Black Jack will subject her too decides to marry the "widowed" Claire to Jamie to make her a Scottish citizen instead.

Claire and Jamie marry and their is infatuation and lust between them at first and it develops into love. Their's is a story of love and loss, as Claire eventually returns home to the present for the sake of her and Jamie's unborn child on the day the Battle of Culloden where Jamie intends to fight and die on the battle field. However their story doesn't end there, eventually (20 years later) Claire discovers Jamie survived the battle and goes back to him at the urging of their daughter Brianna Randall whom Frank raised as his own until his death. Claire returns to Jamie and their adventure continues across the Atlantic Ocean in the New World and now their are a separate set of rules as they arrive on the cusp of the Revolution.

This series has wrecked my heart. I love it so dearly and Jamie is one of my many, many book boyfriends. Overall this series is worthwhile, the books kind of drag on for me I have read 5 out of the 9 novels: Outlander, Dragonfly in Amber, Voyager, Drums of Autumn, and the Fiery Cross. (somewhere in the distance you can hear me singing Livin' on a Prayer by Bon Jovi cause whoooooa I'm halfway there!) I don't know how Diana Gabaldon keeps going and finding more story to tell about the Frasers but she does. Though some of this stems from book fatigue on my part. It's not that I am tired of reading about Jamie and Claire (my saved fanfiction links can attest to that) I think it's the other characters that are involved, like Brianna and her husband Roger MacKenzie Wakefield that I don't like as much. Sure I care about them but I am not as emotionally invested in them as Claire and Jamie. Which is why I haven't read any of the novellas, though there is one about Jamie and Ian I am interested in called Virgins and a prequel novel I am excited about.

Despite my book fatigue about this series I do intend to finish it because I am no quitter!

Okay maybe a little bit of a quitter but I refuse to have a DNF (did not finish) list or pile on Goodreads. It's one of my redeeming qualities, I always finish books, movies, and TV shows because there is the chance it might get good. It may take me a while since I am a professional procrastinator but mark me it will be done. Also someone needs to make a time machine so I can go back in time to punch the Bonnie Prince Charlie because he said "mark me" one to many times and hurt my Jamie. 

Game of Thrones: A Song of Ice and Fire

***SPOILER ALERT***  this post will contain some spoilers so beware.

This past Sunday saw what is perhaps the greatest episode of Game of Thrones (GoT) ever. Fans, myself included, were worried about the events that might take place this season because the show has now extended beyond the books George R.R. Martin has published. Thankfully Martin gave show runners D.B. Weiss and and David Benioff the highlights of his next book The Winds of Winter which as of yet still has no publication date. (I am content to wait forever for the books to publish if that means he will stop killing Starks and direwolves!)

This review will mostly deal with Season 6 of the show, if you are not caught up I would suggest reading no further.

Okay are they gone?

Good.

This season saw and incredible amount of Women Getting Shit Done™. Let's start off with my favorite family the Starks. Last season saw Sansa Stark married to the monster Ramsey Bolton and her being raped and abused. This season with the help of Theon Greyjoy. Brienne of Tarth, and Podrick Payne she has reunited with her brother Jon Snow and the Wall. Jon had it pretty rough last season, not only did he witness the cruelty, destruction and horror the White Walkers are capable of at Hardhome, he also was murdered by his brothers of the Night's Watch at the Wall. Jon remained dead (and naked, thanks HBO) for the first two episodes before he was brought back by the Red Woman, Melissandre of Asshai. (Seriously who was surprised? There have been theories of Jon Snow's resurrection since A Dance with Dragons was published in 2011.) Since Jon has served the Night's Watch until his death (technicality) he steps down for the position of Lord Commander after he sees his tratiorus brother's hung.

Jon is then reunited with Sansa (the Stark Reunion gave me life) and they then plan to take Winterfell back from Ramsey Bolton with the help of the Free Folk (Wildlings), and whatever Northern houses they can rally to their cause.

They receive help from Lyanna Mormont of Bear Island and 62 men. Lyanna Mormont wowed us last season when the eight year old told Stannis Baratheon "Bear Island knows no King but the King in the North, whose name is Stark" via a message by raven. She absolutly lived up to her reputation. This little girl has more mettle than any grown ass man in this show. Even with the few houses Sansa and Jon rally to their cause, several remain loyal to House Bolton out of fear (cause Ramsey is bat shit crazy). They find themselves still outnumbered, and Sansa in her desperation calls on Petyr "Littlefinger" Baelish, and the Knights of the Vale for help. This lead me and Caitie screaming at the TV about how only an idiot trusts Littlefinger.

When it comes time to face Ramsey on the battlefield, Rickon Stark is "given a chance" to reach his brother Jon, but of course Ramsey kills him (I kept yelling "SERPENTINE! SERPENTINE!" while he was running. In. A. Straight. Line. Then when Ramsey killed him Caitie was weeping and I was yelling "I WANT HIM DEAD. I WANT HIS FAMILY DEAD AND HIS HOUSE BURNT TO THE GROUND" about Ramsey). The Battle of the Bastards for the title of King in the North rages, Ramsey seems to have the upper hand, Caitie and I are biting our nails in anticipation, waiting to see if Jon can really win. When it begins to look grim, like our heroes will fail, which in this show would be no surprise they were going to once again crush my dreams and ruin my life (Season 3 Episode 9 I'm looking at you), the Knights of the Vale ride in to save the day. But at what cost? We find out the next episode when Littlefinger tells Sansa he wishes to marry her and take the Iron Throne for himself. Sansa shuts him down, reminding me why I love her and that she isn't a total idiot for asking Baelish for help. because she will never trust the backstabbing bastard again. Then thanks to the mettle of Lyanna Mormont, Jon Snow is named King in the North and all the Northern houses pledge allegiance to House Stark once again, as Sansa smiles, pleased with the outcome until she notices Baelish studying her carefully, having tried to turn Sansa against her bastard half-brother.

Speaking of bastards, the finale saw Bran Stark using his greensight to see the Tower of Joy, which has been an event much debated in the fandom shrouded in mystery and the suspected place of Jon Snow's birth. It is where Lyanna Stark was kept after she was taken by Rhaegar Targaryen that began Robert's Rebellion. We saw a glimpse of this earlier in the season, Bran saw his father Ned Stark and co there fighting two prominent member's of the Kingsguard. Ned's allies all die except for himself and Howland Reed. We learn the noble Eddard Stark lied about what happened during the fight at the Tower of Joy, which leads us to the question what else has he lied about. The confirmation of R+L=J is within sight, you can almost taste it, then Bran is pulled from his vision by the Three Eyed Raven (cock tease). Bran uses his greensight to learn more about the White Walkers, that they were created by the Children of the Forest to protect their weirwood trees from being cut down by men. Bran also disobeys the Three Eyed Raven and goes greenseeing alone and meets the dreaded Night's King. Only the Night's King can see him, he gives Bran a mark that allows the White Walkers' Army to breech the safety of the Three Eyed Raven's secret hideout. A huge fight goes down, the Three Eyed Raven died, the Children of the Forest die, Summer, Bran's direwolf dies (HOW DARE THEY) to show that "summer is truly over and winter is here". Hodor dies because Bran is stuck in a greensight vision of when Hodor was young and Meera Reed screaming "hold the door" leeks thorough, young Hodor (whose name is really Wylis) has a seizure and repeatedly screams "hold the door" until it becomes shortened to Hodor. Hodor then dies holding the door so Meera and Bran can escape. (Sob).

But not for long. The wrights of the White Walkers find them and they are rescued by a mysterious black rider who is supposed to be Coldhands from the books but is Benjen Stark who was resurrected from the dead by the Children of the Forest to fight the White Walkers. Benjen takes Bran and Meera to the weirwood tree just north of the Wall, as he is dead and cannot pass through the Wall. Bran uses his greensight again (seriously get south of the Wall kids!) and were are taken back to the Tower of Joy (never mind, stay in danger I need to see this!). Ned runs up the stairs following Lyanna's agonizing screams to see her dying in a bed of blood (I'm hyperventilating and praying at this point). Ned goes to her, yells for the handmaidens in the room to get her water, but Lyanna refuses she then leans into Ned's ear and whispers "His name is -inaudible-. If Robert finds out, he'll kill him. You know he will. You have to protect him. Promise me Ned. Promise me" (I'm screaming in a deep demonic voice "I KNEW IT"). Ned is handed a baby and Lyanna dies, Bran watched all this in confused surprise. R+L=J, and before all you naysayers tell me "but they only confirmed Lyanna is Jon's mother and Rhaegar is not Jon's father take a gander at what HBO put on their blog:

R+L=J bitches!

Onward to events going on across the Narrow Sea with Daenerys Targaryen. Last season she was kidnapped by the Dothraki and taken to Vaes Dorthrak to decided if she is to become a dosh khaleen. During the meeting of the leaders of several khalasars about her fate Dany burns the patriarchy to the ground! Leaves the burning building unharmed and wins the absolute loyalty of all the Dorthraki in one fell swoop. She names her entire khalasar her Bloodriders instead of just three as is tradition. Now with her stronger numbers Dany is able to retake Meereen from the Sons of the Harpy and the Masters, also freeing Yunkai and Astapor. Theon Greyjoy and his sister Asha Yara arrive in Meereen to offer their ships and allegiance to Dany. Dany and Yara flirt a bit and they become allies.  Varys the Spider goes to Dorne and convinces the Martells and Tyrells to join their cause and the finale sees Dany sailing to Westeros from the newly named Bay of Dragons (formerly Slavers Bay) with her new Hand of the Queen Tyrion Lannister surrounded by an armada of Greyjoys, Tyrells, Martells, Dorthraki, the Unsullied, and of course her three dragons, Drogon, Viserion, and Rhaegal.

In King's Landing things aren't so great. Cersei has lost power thanks to the alliance of the Crown and the Faith. Tommen and Margaery have fallen under the spell of the High Sparrow and Faith Militant. Though we find out Margaery is faking it to save her brother Loras. She sends her grandmother Olenna away to save her from the High Sparrow's grasp, only to fall into Cersei's trap. Cersei has stocked a large cache of wildfire under the Great Sept of Baelor. Blowing it up and killing all inside and for several blocks, Margaery, Loras, the Tyrells (minus Olenna), and the High Sparrow and his followers to name a few. Tommen in his despair leaps from his window to his death. Leaving Cersei alone and childless. She then takes the Iron Throne for herself becoming the Mad Queen.

Olenna travels to Dorne to meet with House Martell, well the ladies and Sand portion of it mostly. Olenna slays and Varys appears, and bada bing, bada boom, alliance time.

There was some stuff going on in the Iron Islands with the Kingsmoot, basically Theon supports Yara to become the Queen of the Iron Islands, but their Uncle Euron, who killed their father takes the throne and they flee to Meereen to side with the Dragon Queen.

Now to the Stark I left out, Arya. She has had a hell of a ride this past season. She joined the Faceless Men, she flunked out, rejoined and the left like a BAMF. She learns to see things from another perspective when she goes blind, becomes another person using the faces, and studies a acting troop who's play is about the events in earlier seasons, sympathetic towards the Lannisters. Arya finds herself and decides to return home to Westeros, except the Waif has been charged to kill her. Instead Arya kills her and adds her bloody face to the Faceless Men's trove. Then Arya mic drops and leaves.

When she arrives in Westeros we catch up with her at Twins, the home of House Frey. Where Jaime and Bronn have been most of the season helping the Frey's take back Riverrun from the Blackfish. Arya, in disguise, murders two of Walder Frey's sons and bakes them in a meat pie, then slits Walder's throat.

It's a beautiful day in Westeros. This season has given me hope. A dangerous amount considering the past horrors this show has afflicted us with. Ned's death, The Red Wedding, Sansa's marriage to Ramsey to name a few. But after watching the finale and having my beloved fan theory of R+L=J confirmed I believe again.

I'm excited to see what happens next season, with Dany coming to ruin Cersei's day and take back the Iron Throne, Jon technically being the rightful Targaryen heir to the Iron Throne, and the impending war with the White Walkers. With just two seasons left according to the show runners I don't know how I'm going to survive the next ten months until season 7.

UPDATE 7/10/2016: 

Game of Thrones Season 7 has been pushed back George R.R. Martin style. I am now super grumpy about it, however so long as the next season is a quality season like this past one was I will forgive them their transgressions. 

Labyrinth (1986)

***SPOILER ALERT*** this post will contain some spoilers so beware

Today marks the 30th Anniversary of my favorite movie of all time. Labyrinth (1986) starring Jennifer Connelly, David Bowie and Toby Froud (which coincidentally today is his 32nd birthday as well), created from the mind of Monty Python's Terry Jones, Jim Henson, George Lucas, and Brian and Wendy Froud. So in celebration of this exciting event I am going to review Labyrinth!

The movie starts out with a really cool title sequence featuring the first ever completely CGI animal, a barn owl to the music of David Bowie (Underground from the Labyrinth soundtrack). Then we are taken to a fantastical land where a maiden in a dress runs up to face her adversary and announces that "through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered I have fought my way to the castle beyond the Goblin City to take back the child you have stolen..." she goes on to say the her "...will is a strong as yours, and my kingdom is as great" only to be interrupted by a flash of lightening and responding clash of thunder. Then in a strange turn of events she mumbles what she just say, while still facing her adversary, only to proclaim "damn I can never remember that line!" and pulls a red book titled The Labyrinth out of her sleeve to recall her next line. But it's too late the enchantment has been broken, we discover the maiden is an ordinary teenage girl, her adversary is her faithful dog companion, and the fantastical land is merely a local park. A bell tolls and the girl runs from the park with her dog Merlin through the rain down suburban streets before arriving home to the disappointment of her stepmother (who through the release of  the Return to Labyrinth manga is named Irene but fans had previously dubbed her Karen). We discover the girl, Sarah (Jennifer Connelly) was supposed to be home an hour ago to babysit her half-brother Toby (Toby Froud). Through this interaction and the discovery of her room we learn Sarah is a fifteen year old girl stuck between her fantasy filled childhood, and growing up into a young lady. (Don't do it it's a trap!)

As the night progresses Sarah unwittingly summons the Goblin King, Jareth (David Bowie) to come and take her baby brother. In order to right her wrong she must solve the Labyrinth and defeat the Goblin King in 13 hours or Toby will be (allegedly) turned into a Goblin. Sarah proves to be impatient and inept at solving the mysteries of the Labyrinth, however thanks to some friends she makes along the way

The Worm

Pictured left to right: Sir Didymus, Hoggle, and Ludo

she manages to solve the Labyrinth, defeat Jareth, and rescue Toby. Through all this Sarah finds a happy medium between her fantasies and growing up (Peter Pan is displeased with you Sarah!)

I "discovered" this movie when I was a very young child (so young I don't remember a life without Labyrinth), my cousin Kasi loved the movie so most every time when all of The Cousins™ stayed at our Grandma's we would watch Labyrinth among others like, Magic Island, Princess Bride, Legend, and Ketchup Vampires to name a few.

30 years ago today Labyrinth premiered in theaters in the United States.

and to celebrate that they are releasing a special 30th Anniversary Edition!

As well as several books. They are all available for pre-order on Amazon as most of the anniversary items will be released this fall. Until then you can fill the void with lots of Labyrinth swag already available on Amazon, Ebay, and Etsy! Like this really awesome phone case and wallet combo I purchased (again) when I got my new phone last year. (I own like three of them because it's my case of choice for all the smartphones I have owned).

Picture is taken from Etsy and is not my image

I would give this movie a higher rating than 5 out of 5 if I could (and thus ignoring the scale we have set here at Nerdy Owl Books and rendering it pointless).

UPDATE 6/28/2016:

THEY ARE RELEASING LABYRINTH FUNKOS! GUYS! GUYS! LOOK HOW COOL THEY ARE!!!!! 

This is literally the best thing to happen to me in years!

UPDATE 8/17/2016:

Hot Topic has released a special Hot Topic Exclusive Jareth Funko you can order here

Now all I need is for them to release a version of Sarah in her ballgown and one of Sir Didymus and Ambrosius for my life to be complete... for now. 

The Beast by Lindsay Mead

This so far has been my favorite Beauty and the Beast retelling. It was slow at first the book's opening heavily focused on world-building that payed off in the end. The places that the book describes are explained with enough magic and fantasy ground in reality to make it seem like a real place. The characters are the usual suspects, Belle, Gaston, Belle's father, the Beast, but these characters that have appeared in various stories for well over a century have a fresh feeling. Belle is still the girl we know who wants adventure it the great wide somewhere, but she is also a kick ass hunter who somehow also remains a lady. It's refreshing to have a female lead in a book who is equal parts bad ass, but does so in a fancy dress with minimal complaint. Then there is Gastone (aka Gaston) who I really dislike because of the Disney movie, but he proved to actually be an okay guy. He's still arrogant, but acceptably so. Belle's father is still an inventor but also the leader of a group of hunters that have been charged by the Catholic Church to find and kill hellhounds (kind of like werewolves or black dogs for my paranormally inclined readers). Then there's the Beast. The Prince Aleksander from the neighboring kingdom of Vakre Fjell and his entire kingdom is cursed. Those outside of the protection of the palace turn into hellhounds and those within the palace are trapped. The prince himself has been turned into a "hideous" beast and can only communicate with people through their shared dreams using magic.

The books is incredibly well written, and minus a few questions I have (like how does this shared dreaming thing work, and if everyone is trapped in the palace grounds and can't leave, how and where do they get their food and supplies for all their finery?) it's a well thought out world and concept. I can't wait for the sequels to be published. You can support the author here.

Withering Rose by Kaitlyn Davis

A big thanks to Netgalley for letting me receive a copy for free for an honest review.

This book was amazing, it was reminiscent of the 10th Kingdom miniseries and book I love so much. The premise of this series is that their was a parallel universe to ours that was full of magic and fairy tale like wonder (read: horror). But due to an earthquake in both multiverses they collide and form a new world that is a combination of both, and of course the natives of Earth are afraid of the magic that comes with the new inhabitants and decide to hunt them down and remove magic from the world. Kind of like the European Witch Hunts. The main character Omorose is an unfortunate magic user who must hide her magic abilities and forsake them because she would be killed if she was discovered, and also she is cursed. Every time she uses her ability she losses time and it shortens her life. So in a desperate attempt at freedom to use her magic, or rid herself of it forever she escapes to the Beast's kingdom, who the Earthling's and Fairy Tale people both fear.

Overall I really enjoyed this book. I'm definitely adding the rest of this series to my TBR list. What I liked most about this story is the complexity of the world the author has created. It's part dystopian and part high fantasy. The characters could use a little more depth, they seem a little flat at times, and their backstories get a little confusing as they are glossed over. However I absolutely loved the idea that magic users suffer a curse, because magic costs something, and I like the reason behind the curse. I was conflicted over the Earthling's reaction to magic existing and how they are so untrusting of the people from the fairy tale world, but the more I thought about it the more I realized that it was a very accurate response. People were afraid of something they had no control over, and they did what they always do. They hunt it down and kill it. Case in point, the Salem Witch Trials. The persecution of the Protestants by the Catholic Church, the Spanish Inquisition. So while I would like to believe that people would be more accepting in circumstances such as the ones presented in the book, history has shown again and again that that would not be the case.

The Musketeers

***SPOILER ALERT*** this post will contain some spoilers so beware.

I have found a new favorite TV show in the form of this swashbuckling adventure The Musketeers from BBC based on the classic tale The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas. The show differs from the book I am told. (I'm still waiting for my copy of the book I ordered from Amazon to arrive so I can confirm the differences for myself.) 

The show begins with two travelers in the rain who are on their way to Paris to petition the King to lower taxes as their farming community in Gascony can no longer afford the burden. They stop at an inn at the insistence of the younger traveler as his father is tired and he can tell. This proves fatal. Furthering my belief that motels on the side of the road are murder traps! I digress... the pair, as well as other guests of the inn are set upon by bandits claiming to be Musketeers led by Athos. (I saw this, and having the firm conviction that the Musketeers where all honorable and whatnot I starting singing the "mmm why you lying" song to myself.) The young boy attacks the bandits but they get away, he apologizes to his father, only for his father to collapse and die from a bullet wound, his last words being "Athos". The young boy with the now tragic backstory making him a main character is D'Artagnan, played by Luke Pasqualino.

(What a hottie). He continues on to Paris to find Athos and kill him for murdering his father (it's the 1630s and while dueling is currently illegal in France, his honor demands satisfaction and revenge, or whatever). Then we are taken to Paris to meet the Inseparables (aka the Three Musketeers): Athos (Tom Burke) , Porthos (Howard Charles), and Aramis (Santiago Cabrera).

(Again, what hotties, though Aramis is my favorite, look at that beard, it's so Errol Flynn.) Who are being ordered by Captain Treville to find a missing group of Musketeers.

D'Artagnan has arrived in Paris, in which he is chased and forced to jump from a window to escape being wanted for a murder he didn't commit, framed by a "completely unimportant" lady he meets in a inn. He finds a cute girl and offers to pay her to kiss him. Which allows him to escape and then face the wrath of Madame Constance Bonacieux. 

Seriously I wouldn't mess with her. D'Artagnan collapses, you know because he jumped through a window like an idiot. A brave idiot, but seriously, don't jump out windows guys, even if you're running for your life, you're more than likely to break your leg, or other bones that would hinder said escape more than help. Anyways Constance helps D'Artagnan and then he goes off to find Athos because he has a one track mind. So D'Artagnan appears in the Musketeer Garrison courtyard and loudly asks for Athos of the King's Musketeers, when Athos, the real Athos, confirms who he is, D'Artagnan challenges Athos to a duel saying one of them will die here, and illegal dueling ensues. D'Artagnan proves to be a skillful swordsman, if not a little rough around the edges, but is no match for Athos, or Aramis and Porthos when they join in. The madness is stopped by Constance who arrives to scold them for fighting, Athos continues to insist he is not the man D'Artagnan is looking for, this is all interrupted by Captain Treville

and some Red Guards who are there to arrest Athos for murders and robbery. D'Artagnan convinced there is more to his father's murder than meets the eye agrees to investigate with Porthos and Aramis to clear Athos name and figure out the mystery of the rouge Musketeers, and the missing troop of Musketeers, which shocker are all related. (I really do love this show, I'm just a sarcastic little shit.) 

The show has a villain of the week set-up, as well as a big overall baddie who is usually behind most of the other villains, In season one the "villain" is the Cardinal Armand Jean du Plessis, Duke of Richelieu played by the ever perfect Peter Capaldi.

Season two the villain is Douchefort Rochefort.

And season three has these two guys, Lucien Grimaud and Maquis de Feron.

Throughout all their adventure the Musketeers forge a strong bond of friendship while serving their King and Queen.

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Aramis really serves his Queen y'all

Yea that's right the Dauphin (Prince of France) is Aramis' son, not the King's, which differs from the book (so I am told) but I like the star crossed/forbidden lovers story line. All the characters have some pretty set character traits; Aramis is the romantic hero archetype who woos women and is suave and debonair but also a swashbuckling hero in this gunpowder fantasy. Athos the brooding drunk who is the one in charge of this group. Porthos the former Court of Miracles thief with a heart of gold, cheats at cards, and is basically strong as an ox. D'Artagnan is the rookie farm boy, rough but promising which completes this team of Inseparables, and of course you all know the Musketeers motto:

Just kidding, we all know it's:

I could literally spend all day looking up and posting images of Aramis, he's my favorite.

But I shall leave it at this. While sometimes the plot of the Musketeers gets a little convoluted, or implausible, overall I really like it. It's semi-historical, it has romance...fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles- oh sorry that's The Princess Bride, excuse me. *Ahem* It has romance, adventure, fencing, etc, but no giants or monsters really, and as for miracles and true love, well you'll just have to decide that for yourself.